My Favorite Things

Cortisone shots in my shoulder and ankle
These are a few of my favorite things!!

My shoulder isn't getting any better. 1 year of conducting and piano lessons and my shoulder is still a national disaster area. I wonder if the President will visit me soon...

I got another cortisone shot in my should and I really did start singing to my doctor about cortisone shots are among my favorite things. I will be rewriting the whole song to chronicle my medical adventures this year.

This shot didn't hurt as badly as the other ones--a pleasant surprise after the doctor warning me that the cold spray only anesthetises the surface. But don't be fooled, it still hurt. In fact the bonus pain has extended into today. It's just that the last shot to my shoulder had me crying and shouting. The shot to my ankle added pounding on the wall 10 times in rapid succession so that the person in the room next door got quite a scare.

What really hurt is that he started talking about arthroscopic surgery to fix the tear in my rotator cuff. I was hoping not to have to do that, but let's face facts. It stilll hurts. It isn't healing as fast as it "should."

If I had the surgery, I wouldn't be able to work at all for awhile. Who ever heard of a substitute teacher who can't write on the board? Unless I practice really hard with my left. Then the kids would make fun of me for my awful writing. Is that English, Miss Diaz? It looks like Chinese!! I would laugh too. I could have one of the kids write on the board. They love that. But if I didn't work, my old school district would have to pay out disability--which I love. They deserve much more than that actually. But I still don't love the idea of having to have it. But there is such a long list of things that I can't do anymore.

I don't even touch the piano anymore. Typing hurts sometimes and that's my only outlet. I've switched everything possible to my left hand. I've been trying to bowl, play volleyball, fish left handed with often embarrassing results. I don't dance anymore--I used to dance all the time. Swing, salsa and tango are all out for me now because partner dances involve the guy spinning the lady with her right arm. I can't dance folklorico with the big skirts anymore because moving the skirt kills my right shoulder. Dance was my favorite excercise. I can't even do yoga anymore because I can't do the upper body things evenly. There will be no downward facing dog for me. I used to fence in college, this weekend I am going to learn how to fence left handed. I can't even go to the shooting range because my aim is so bad and it hurts my shoulder. I used to be a good shot.

And this appointment, I still found myself wanting to call the only other person I know who has a shoulder injury from music-related activities. It hurts that we can't seem to fix things between us. I saw him recently and didn't speak to him except a terse hello. I'm sure his shoulder still hurts too.

At least my doctor and the office got a nice laugh out of me singing. I'm quite the office drama queen. They love me because I entertain them.

10 Things I Hate About You

A letter to the Former Choir Teacher

1. I hate you for taking a full time choir position and dismantling it to teach piano so you didn’t have to perform as much.

2. I hate you for taking all of your piano music. You left me in a panic right before school started. I had to go through a lot of hoops to get books.

3. I hate you for taking keyboards with you. I’m sure they were yours and all, but I didn’t have enough to start the year.

4. I hate you for using parents and children as messengers to the school and the district to try to get your job back.

5. I hate you for writing letters to the newspaper to make all your woes public.

6. I hate you for messing with kids’ minds by posting your salary on the wall in your office and telling them that you were leaving for money. They feel abandoned.

7. I hate you because the mess you left made it impossible for me to make things work.

8. I hate you because the kids all decided they couldn’t sing when you left. I didn’t have the choir program I heard about.

9. I hate you because the community was still on your side. Nothing I did was good enough.

10. I hate you because the accompanist you had for years retired when you left. I’ve ended up with a rotator cuff tear from all the practice I had to do to keep up.

11. I hate you for not leaving a list of performances or community contacts. The district told me you said you would. (oops, I hate you more than I thought!)


I hate because you’re so manipulative and just plain hateful. This whole year has been unfair to me. I’m a good teacher and didn’t have a chance to let that show because of all you did. I’m sorry you didn’t get everything you wanted and that you ended up not being as happy as you thought you would be, but did you have to tear my life apart in the process? Or did you forget that there might be a real human being at the other end of your war with the district? I’m just starting out in my career, hoping to make a difference in kids’ lives. Just like you, I wanted to work near where I grew up. Did you stop and think that you might really be hurting someone like me? I hate you because it’s so obvious you didn’t! (Is that 13?)

I think you’re too selfish to care. I’ve kept my mouth shut and tried to be polite, but I really, really hate you. And you can have your job back if you can get it. I don’t think the district will hire you back because you’ve put people there through a lot of grief. They hate you too.

Hatefully Yours,
Miss D

Cortisone Shot

I went to the doctor today to look at the MRI. The bright white spots are the ones that show where there is a problem. there is definitely a tear of some kind in one of the my rotator cuff muscles. I've been hurting for so long that I didn't know what to do when he told me that he was going to ask for more physical therapy through work comp. Work comp takes forever and there is no guarantee that it will even be approved. Great!
I need something now.
Doc: Well, we'll see what happens with the PT, did it help?
D: Yes, but I have three weeks left of school, then I can rest. I hurt now. They were going to give me a cortisone shot two months ago, but then they referred me to you instead because they thought something was wrong.
Doc: Well, if you don't get approved, we'll do it then.
D: Can't we do it now?
Doc: Well, if you really want a shot, I guess we can give it to you.
D: Thanks. I think it will really help.

It hurt sooooo much!! It still hurts. The needle was sooooo long. But it actually has started helping.

Wits End

It's no secret that it's hard to replace a choir teacher that was there for 10 years, even if they weren't very popular. But the teacher I replaced was very popular... and that makes it way worse.

Today's classes were really awful. I decided to talk to the pricipal because I was at the point of tears. The position I have now isn't the position I was sold and things have been going on a downhill slide. My accompanist is, quite frankly, a major source of discouragement to me. She said, I can tell you right now, if I were the teacher, they wouldn't be acting like this. Well, that's interesting, she's perfectly capapble of writing a referral or disciplining the kids and they still act the same way in front of her.

I told the pricipal at the high school that the way things are going right now, I don't think that we will be able to have a concert. I have no support from the community. Every time I have called home people tell me there wasn't a problem until I came along. If i can suspend kids from class and get to the ones that really do want to work, we might still be able to have a concert. But quite frankly, the counselors have torn this program to shreds by putting kids in the class that don't want it for the sake of numbers. Why would you give me kids that don't want to sing and don't want to be there and then blame me that it's not going well? I tried to kick kids out, but I wasn't allowed to. Now I've got them saying they have their quinceanera or other family opbligations or work and they won't be there. I need major support to make this concert happen, but its not fair to me to have to put on crap in front of the community. I'm a good teacher, but I haven't had a chance to let that show.

Then I found out what that other teacher had really done. He had slowly dismantled the full time choir program to the point where he was mainly teaching piano so that he wouldn't have so many performances. I wasnt' ready to teach piano. I've done it, but it's been so hard. He wrote nasty letters saying he was forced out of his job that were published in community newspapers. He burned every bridge there was to burn. He wanted more money--more of a stipend than anyone else plus a salary increase. He let the superintendent of schools have it. He took all of his piano music with him. He didn't leave me a list of community contacts or upcoming concerts. He's used parents and students as messengers to let the administration know that he wanted his job back in November. Most people don't do these kinds of things when they leave a job.

I've been keeping it all in and trying to stay out of trouble as much as possible. But I've been getting all of the blame. I've had to sit through bad reviews that sent me home crying and wondering if I should even continue teaching. Everyone else is going to be fine. The principal is retiring, the community will move on, the school will still be there next year, the Board of Education will still be there.

I'm the one who has been hit the hardest. I'mthe one who had gone home crying after bad reviews. I'm the one with a torn rotator cuff. I'm the one who has to look for a new job next year and I have nothing I can show for that. I'm the one wondering if I should even teach anymore.

Preventing Shoulder Injuries--A Robot For Conductors

I can totally use one of these ASIMO robots. I don't know if my students will respond all that well to it, but it's worth a shot. It turns out that I have a torn rotator cuff from all my conducting and playing piano. I had an MRI just last week. Next week the doctor will let me know if he thinks I should have surgery.

All I know is that I feel like I have sacrificed alot for this job. I wish I had kept looking instead of taking the first job offer I got. If I hadn't had to practice piano so much for teaching my piano classes, maybe I wouldn't be in such bad shape.

What Honda doesn't realize is that orchestras know how to compensate for bad conductors. They've been doing it for hundreds of years! The real test is whether or not a bunch of teenaged kids can follow it, not a bunch of professional musicians.

In any case, where do I get one?


read the original CNN article | digg story

Most Injured Teacher of the Year

I have now racked up 5 industrial accidents. Crazy huh? I have people scratching their heads over this.I was going to watch my JV softball girls play since I have so many in choir and then a foul ball got hit out of bound right in front of me, so I went down into a ditch to get the all thinking I would be nice. I like sports. Wouldn't you know it, when I went into the ditch to get the ball, I sprained my ankle. The Asst. Principal who is in charge of the industrial accidents at the high school said I should have spoken to him so I could get the paper work. I had to go see the Vice Principal in his office during my prep period.

MissD: Wow, in high school, I never got in trouble. I got Saturday school only once and I was terrified. I'm sitting here and I feel like I'm in trouble.
VPrin: That's funny. No, you certainly aren't in trouble.
MissD: Well, do I win an award for most injured employee?
VPrin: Well, I don't think I have ever had anyone be injured as much as you have been. So, what were you wearing? Dress shoes or tennis shoes?
MissD: Um...dressy shoes. I would actually say dressy casual. And black pants--capri pants actually. I looked really cute.
VPrin: And your shirt?
MissD: Oh yes, it was a cotton peasant shirt--DKNY. Are you going to write that on the form?
VPrin: Um, I'll put that in parenthesis. He seemed amused though.
MissD: I'm glad you're sort of laughing.
VPrin: Why didn't you come talk to me at the softball game?
MissD: Well, when I sprained my ankle right before the concert in December, I got chewed out by the superintendent and he said it looked like I was walking just fine, but I had a concert to do. I did the whole concert standing on one leg. And I feel bad that I've gotten hurt so much at work. I thought also they would count it as a recurrence since my file is still open with the the prior injury.

VPrin: Well, you got hurt and I feel bad that you were hurt. Next time tell me right away.

He was actually sympathetic. And be careful. No getting balls in ditches anymore.

MissD: I guess I forget that I'm not 17 anymore.

And while I thought he was a sympathetic soul who was on my side, he then changed his tone.

VPrin:  I thought about it, and I'm denying your claim.  You weren't technically working because it was after school.
MissD:  Yes, but don't you encourage teachers to support students in their activities?  I was trying to make a bridge to my students and show them that I care.
VPrin:  It was after school hours and you weren't required to be there.

There's something wrong with this.  Oh, well.  Back to the boot.  Pretty sure that's what they'll have me do.