The Show Must Go On

I sang in my first jazz showcase. Some things went great, some not so great. It sort of bothers me that I paid an accompanist for his rehearsal time and he still made a mistake--a big one. And then I made a mistake based on some of those mistakes. I have learned that I have to remind the band of things we discussed even if I did had a rehearsal the day before. I am a perfectionist. I wanted everything to go off without a hitch. But it didn't happen that way. Instead, it was an imperfect document of where I am now, things I need to work on and things that went well. I've learned that I have to choose my songs even more wisely. I've learned that I have to be even more memorized. I've learned that for being a conductor, I have to learn how to stand up for myself in front of a jazz combo and take control of the music rather than let them hijack something into a direction I don't want to go.

A friend of mine made me feel really good about the mistakes I dealt with that evening.
Friend: You did really well, you have a great voice. How long have you been singing jazz?
MissD: Two months.
Friend: You're in a transition. You'll be fine. You just have to let go of that perfectionistic tendancy.
MissD: Yes, that's true. In classical music everything is regulated note for note, jazz is much freer. I just have to learn to roll with it if things don't go my way.

How does this apply to choir? Kids need to understand all of these things too. They need to realize that it takes more rehearsal than anyone thinks it takes. You have to know a song hot, cold, rainy, while a tsunami hits or while a tornado approaches. When you are a kid, you think you know everything. You think you know it, but you've only heard it. You think you know it, but you forget a few words. You think you know it, but you aren't always singing in tune. Finally you know it, but you must also be able to interpret. Choir is just as much of a learning experience as performing. What keeps songs fresh is that each day you must find within yourself yet a new way of singing it and new way of connecting with the text.

And lastly, I have to think about what I'm going to do with the rest of my time while I'm substitute teaching. Not only are these activities going to be music related, they will also need to be profit oriented. At least that's the hope!!

Junk In My Trunk

It's an embarrassing time of year for teachers. I filled my car up with all of my stuff from my classroom. Old music that I used stuffed in boxes, piano music, vocal music, lesson plans, overhead sheets for teaching piano, various knickknacks, schoolwork neatly tucked into folders for just in case throughout the year... I gave them their folders, but some didn't want their work. I thought it was sad, so I kept it all. I took things down from the walls... I took home the Bingo cards and equipment in the box that I had intended to use as a fundraiser. It didn't work out that way. I had such great ideas.

It all sounds so simple when i write about it, but this is a year's worth of stuff now packed in my car. When I was in college everything I owned somehow fit in my car. Now it's not so simple. Being a choir and piano teacher meant having books and books and tons of sheet music.

I couldn't bring myself to erase the sweet notes that the kids had written to me on the last day of school or the 08 on the back window. The junk is still in my trunk and in the back seat of my car. I know I need to clean it out, but somehow my energy slipped out from under me. I have been driving around for a week with it all.

Over the week I discovered a what used to be a bag of baby carrots that had been cooked in my car. It took me awhile to figure out what those brownish little stumps were. Prunes? I don't eat prunes. a vanilla candle melted in a bag in the back seat from the 100 degree heat. Hehe, oops. I think it's time.

The Elusive Happy Place

I woke up feeling tired and angry this morning. Tired because I didn't sleep enough. Just plain angry over EVERYTHING. I have friends and have heard of teachers who have all kinds of methods to make it through the day. Valium, pot, whatever. I was thinking of taking some dexedrine that I have left over from another time, but it's old and I'm not sure how it would impact me at the end of the day. It's slightly addictive and there is a crash when you come off of it. But it would make me happy.

I decided to up the dose of the antidepressant I have been taking. It helped a little, but I was still unhappy. I still cried after school. In front of a student when she said I looked stressed. I cried because some of the kids asked the accompanist to sign their yearbooks, but not me. One kid asked me, though.

I took a nap after school for 2 hours.

From Post Secret

I love Post Secret!!!

I can totally see why...and I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this way even though I'm not taking Valium. Maybe I should... It might help.

Tell Me Something Good

I went shopping to return some shoes and ended up shopping for more shoes. I ran into one of my students.



Miss D! I heard my name called from across the shoe department. One of my students, Gina, sat in a chair with her legs crossed. She is delicate like a cat. Her mom was trying on shoes. I love shoes.

My daughter really likes you. She thinks you're funny. She was just telling me how much fun choir practice was today.

Wow. It was so great to hear the good when there has been so much bad.

Traffic School

One of the things I have to do on my sick day is complete and 8 hour traffic school course. I was very naughty and on the first day of school made a left turn into the school because I was running so late. Bad idea. There was a sign posted.

One of the problems I am having with the online traffic school is that I read REALLY fast. I am a writer, after all. I have always read really fast. In fact I read so fast that people don't believe it. I read whole memos at a glance when I hand them to people. I have read the MOST INTERESTING documents. When I was temping for a medical manufacturer of breast implants, I read everything that they asked us to photocopy. They were none the wiser that I was doing this on their dime. They complimented me on my fast work.

Apparently my fast mouth is legendary.
Principal: Tell me you did not tell the police officer to put the ticket in your box because you had to get to class.
MissD: Ummm. OK. I didn't tell him that.
Principal: Look, she's turning red. Now I KNOW you said that.

Yep, got me. It was the first day of school. I was totally freaked out and the traffic was way worse than I expected.

It's ok, it's giving me a chance to catch up on listening to all the wonderful things on YouTube. I'm addicted to Royal Crown Revue right now. Check them out!! Royal Crown Revue in The Mask with Jim Carrey. Hey Pachuco! You can also visit their cool website with videos and a music player. www.rcr.com

Time Off

I'm still looking for my prince. You do have to kiss alot of frogs...Maybe my prince is really a frog. Maybe the frog is just fine how he is!!

I had an interesting weekend. I went to see the symphony perform film music. Then I got bored because great songs from film aren't the same when the singers sing in such a contrasting style from the original. Modern vocal style clashes with old standards, but then again, that's just my opinion.

SO after that, I went karaoking. I now have goal with it--I've decided to submit an application for America's Got Talent. Apparently I have a little bit. You see, it's hard for a performer to give up performing. But I don't want to go into it full time again. I hate auditioning. It's abyssmal pay when you get work for the majority of actors. Musicals pay about $800 a week for an Equity union contract. Good luck getting that contract. For now I'm sticking with having some fun at karaoke.

Senior Ditch Day

For some reason, senior ditch day had seniors still hanging around a little. I don't know about you, but when I was a senior, I didn't go anywhere NEAR the school on a ditch day. But the principal decided to schedule the college application workshop the same day as senior ditch day. Teachers scheduled tests. Kids were told if they missed those things on that day and they were seniors that they would not be allowed to make it up.

What did that do? We had a rash of seniors around the campus to go to those periods that had those tests. They also showed up for their application workshops. Sassy and his posse visited and left quickly.

When other seniors came I asked them,
What are you doing here on Senior Ditch Day?
We already ditched on Friday, the day it was changed to.

That's when I heard about all the tests and the application worskshops. Some seniors ditched for both the days. In the end, Sassy and I got a break from each other for the day.

The problem is that it gutted my choir for the day. I decided I would still make them work as a small ensemble. They need to learn that sometimes that happens. They need to work on holding their parts. I worked with one of my soloists. It was still a productive day.

We had Open House in the evening. One of my seniors said, I came by to see you because I missed you today. Awww, that was sweet. He also told me he was feeling ill until about 3pm when it suddenly cleared up. I had those days back then, too. I hate to admit to HOW MANY!!

Seniors Hate Freshmen

I am planning a concert with a 1950s theme. It's going to be alot of fun. The repertoire looks like this:

Mr. Sandman
Sixteen Candles
Bye Bye Love
Sincerely
Lollipop
Why do fools fall in Love?
Rock and Roll is Here to Stay
Rock Around the Clock

From Grease:
We Go Together
Hopelessly Devoted to You

I was hoping to include Graduation Day by The Four Freshmen once I found it.

The high school choirs will sing We Go Together as a group. This is going to be a really fun concert. They are really warming up to it. Some of them sing along with all the du wop hits of the 50s and 60s. I'm not the only one who has my car radio permanently tuned to an oldies station. Two of my boys started asking if we could sing Earth Angel. I decided it was worth looking into. I didn't find just Earth Angel, but it was a part of a medly with Graduation Day, originally recorded by The Four Freshmen in 1956 or something like that. I thought it was pretty and sweet.

Of course the line about dancing at the senior prom until three was really amusing since I think I was at the beach then went to Denny's and stayed up all night. I think I climbed in my window in my formal gown around 3 so I wouldn't wake my parents--or that was my junior prom? No idea anymore. It was also amusing about the ivy covered walls. We don't have ivy covering anything really where I live and teach. I don't think that The Four Freshmen still sing that song at their concerts. I really don't know. I was sort of seeing one of the guys from that band for a little while. (Whatever that means.) I texted him to let him know that my "kiddies" would be singing that song. He always used to text me Hope your week with the kiddies was good. He knew I taught high school. Kiddies. Whatever. He was funny that way. He used to teach high school band for a year before joining The Four Freshmen.

I didn't hear back from him. It's just as well. My kids hated the song. Not really hated--they thought it was pretty, but kind of slow. It was that Do we have to? look in their slightly glazed eyes. It didn't really hit them like the songs that they know. Maybe they were worried I would replace those songs. For graduation we will be doing You Raise Me Up with the mixed chorus and The Wind Beneath My Wings with the girls chorus. Maybe they didn't want to lose them. It's also just that those are modern sings and I did want to include something that fits our theme.

I AM the teacher, if I really wanted to, I could make them sing it. But I could also have them sing Route 66 which is also vocal jazz. They might like that better. I like to have the kids be interested in what we sing, even though they seem to change their minds alot. Suddenly they hate their Grease medly. Whatever. Kids are funny.

Principal Search

One of my teacher friends was chosen for the interview committee to find a new principal. She is also the union representative at the high school. I wrote her a little email about some of the things that are important to me in finding a new principal.

Chris,
This is really important. He should be good-looking, single and available. If he is married, he should have some really cool, good-looking friends that he can introduce us to. Actually,he should have lots of single guy friends either way. It's so hard to meet eligible bachelors at work as a teacher. Thanks for looking after our interests.

D

Her reply:

My sentiments exactly!!!

Observation Day

I like to make my kids laugh to help them remember stuff. It's taken a long time to be able to really joke around with them without things getting out of control, but I just think humor is essential in the classroom. Sometimes my junior high kids even encourage me to act a little bit crazier.

I have one student who always wants to know about my love life. However, today I was being observed by my support provider, so I was really not expecting the joking. Maybe it was OK because it shows I have good rapport with my students.

I made them repeat after me in a choral response:

In the key of F major...

LOUDER!!! I can't hear half of you!

In the key of F major
you must always play
B flat.
Play what? B flat!

I went to each of their keyboards to make sure they understood how to apply this to the new songs they are learning.

Miss Diaz? Have you ever been married?
Me? Why do you want to know?
Cause...
Well, dear, I'm so glad you are concerned about my happiness. That's really sweet. How about I have you be my flower girl when I get married? Now get to work. B flat!!

She smiled. She can be kind of manipulative and conniving at times, but she's also cute in that endearing way 12 year old girls have about them. It tickles me.

No, I've never been married.

BTSA

BTSA stands for Beginning Teacher Support and Assessment. My support provider and I just met over Spring Break for breakfast. We are supposed to meet an hour a week and have fallen behind, so I bought breakfast for her. Part of the time was taken up with me being on the phone with the insurance adjuster for the accident I was in.

I shared with her all the crazy things that have happened in my life lately.

The key question she asked me is:
How can you deal with your personal life so that it doesn't affect your professional life?

WOW! Good question.

Sometimes you just can't deal. After my accident I did get a substitute for two days. That's what we have substitute teachers for. But on a day to day basis, most things aren't bad enough to call for a substitute. Ultimately, the show must go on. I've been through worse. I was sick as a dog, totally wiped out and trying to put a concert together with three choirs. My cheese was really sliding off my cracker then. I only had just a few days that I could call on a substitute because I had to be there to get the kids ready for the concert.

I have other outlets and hobbies. I belong to a folklorico dance group. I go to the gym alot. I have a social life, even though I slightly impaired part of it this last weekend. I'd like to get back into yoga. That might help keep me more centered. One of these days I'd like to start going to church again.

Sometimes when you can barely make it, you just have to fake it.

Recipe for Spring Break Social Disaster

Sometimes my kids ask me if I party or used to party in high school. Well...

Take 1 stressed out choir teacher on spring break who wants to have fun and add:

1 car accident
1 migraine on and off for 1.5 weeks
1 Celebrex for injured shoulder
1 Flexeril for muscle spasms
2 Tesalon pearls for oncoming cough
4 Alleve for migraine
1 guy hitting on her at restaurant
1 guy asking for coffee date
1 guy she used to date, also at restaurant
1 guy with ulterior motives for interfering
5 glasses of wine
4 course meal of elf-like portions

Make sure teacher doesn't eat all day long from headache and forgets about alcohol warning labels on medications. Add together slowly in an Italian restaurant for 3 hours. Watch all judgement, grace, social polish and emotional control completely disappear as she becomes so intoxicated she doesn't know where she is. When she wants protection from the other guys, she goes to the guy she used to date and then starts sobbing uncontrollably which only causes a major scene and great embarrassment.

I remember high school parties being about like that.